A Letter From the Editor of WedLock
* Part One of A Two-Part Series*

My four-year-old son wouldn’t sit on Santa’s lap this year.  “No fanks,” said he.

(And can we blame him? Sitting on a round stranger’s lap, asking for freebies, is one of the more bizarre things we expect our children to do.)

So I get that he was nervous about the lap-sitting part. But do you know what part he had NO problem doing? The asking part.

When we finally found a Santa who had a chair set up next to him, Mr. “No Fanks” hopped right up and happily rattled off everything he wanted.

Watching this, it struck me that even the most bashful of kids clearly have no issue asking for what they want…so why do we? Because we do! As business owners, we really, really do have a problem with asking.

Whenever I speak in front of a group of wedding pros and talk about getting brides to post online reviews, I can see many of themvisibly cringing. Some even raise their hand and say “Can you help us with the wording of that? I always feel weird asking…”

But you can’t feel weird! Your business won’t survive. In order to make it in this economy, you have to become comfortable with marketing. With sales. With asking.

Yes, asking.

We say sales is hard for the wedding pro, and it is. But really all that is behind a fear of sales is a ‘fear of asking’.  You just can’t quite make yourself ask for what you really need. Like a signed contract, or a happy testimonial.

So I thought I’d do you guys a favor and pronounce 2012 as the Year of the Ask.  If you won’t giveyourself permission to ask for what you, and your business, need to succeed…then I’ll give it to you.  You hereby have full permission to ask for what your business needs.

Ask for Bridal Reviews: Your online reputation can make or break your business. You have heard this before from countless experts, and they are all absolutely correct. You must be online and you must have positive bridal reviews posted online.

So allow me to put some words in your mouth, if it helps you start this conversation. How about, the next time your bride is personally thanking you,you saying something like:

“That means so much to me! I loved working on your wedding and I’m glad it showed. While we’re talking about it,would you mind posting a review about my work online, even just a few words? Itshould only take you a few minutes and it really helps my business whenhappy brides write even a sentence or two about me on my Facebookwall/Yelp/WeddingWire/etc?”

Ask For Referrals:We’ve addressed this is in past issues of WedLock, but it bears repeating. In Issue 10, Andy Ebon wrote a fantastic column with tips on how to get on someone’s preferred vendor list. And our readers loved the article “Romancing the Venue” by the Westin Hotel’s Arik Cullen in Issue 12.

What’s the bottom line? Asking to be on someone’s preferred vendor list is an important marketing technique. It’s also an art. You have to do it right or it can backfire. So find ways to prove yourself to your fellow vendor. Gain their confidence.  Reassure them that you’re going to make them look good by recommending you. But ask. You have to ask.

Ask for Blog Help:  On January 31, I’ll be presenting a free two-hour blogging webinar. How to do it better, easier, faster…and in more fun ways. And one of the things I’m going to cover is how to get other folks blogging FOR you. Yes, it’s called Guest Blogging and it’s one of the coolest ‘win wins’ in the industry.

So next time you’re short for blogging time or ideas, reach out and ask your fellow vendor if they want to guest blog for you. You win because you get free content on your blog. They win because they get increased exposure by getting in front of your readership.  Everyone wins, all because you took the time to “make the ask!”

Ask For Time: Like the rest of the planet, wedding pros always are short on time. It doesn’t matter what I question I ask them. “Why aren’t you doing more with social media?” or “Why haven’t you posted your site for review on our expert forums?” Nine times out of ten, the answer is “I don’t have time.”

But I wonder if that’s true. Do you truly not have enough time to do these very crucial things for your business.  Or are you just spending it on things tha tyou really could turn down. I’ve blogged about this in more detail before, but the main thing is to ask for more time. Get more of your time back.

Log what you spend your workday doing. Just do this for a day or two. Then look it over and make some cuts. It’s easier than you think. Trust me when I tell you that your girlfriends won’t hate you for missing one brunch here and there.  Or maybe your husband can be the one to do the laundry Saturday morning instead of you.

Try it! You’ll be surprised how much your friends and family can help you free up time for important business tasks…if only you’d ask!

Tell me, in the comments below, what YOU have trouble asking for.

Is it help? Time? Advice? Let’s overcome those fears together!

Stay tuned for Part Two of The Year of Fearless Asking.

And save your seat RIGHT NOW for our fabulous FREE January 31 blogging webinar!